Forgive me, Father

Grow in spiritual maturity by making it a priority to spend time with God.

Lately I have been neglecting my time with God. I haven't been reading and reflecting on my daily bread for months now. Everyday I'm reading my usual dose of entries from the bibles through the net, but really it's like I read it then it's gone in my head. Deep inside it keeps nagging me, telling me what I already know in my mind. I am neglecting spending my time with God and I am truly sorry for this. I'd like to think I was busy with the move. But I know for a fact that I'm not.

Everyday I've been dragging myself to work, feeling less and less the joy of my job. I have already thought that I have resolved my issues with work, deciding that I am happy here and content. Sure it's less than fulfilling, I'm always on my ass, but just thinking about working another job, it just creeps me out, and so I keep telling myself that I'm happy where I am. With my family's financial standing not being stable since we've already moved out from my mom's, is also another factor why I'm staying. It's just really bothering me I'm almost on the edge.

Then it hits me like a derailed train right now that what I need is the guidance of my Father, what I have been neglecting all this time. I'm sorry Father that I haven't been talking to you and asking for your help. I'm sorry that my worldly problems keep my mind away from you and I'm sorry that I relied on myself or in another person in solving my problems when you alone have the answer to everything and I only need to trust and surrender everything to you, but now it's clearer than daylight Father that it was You who I needed all along. I'm just so sorry it took me all this time to realize, although it had been right infront of me. I pray that you will forgive me Father for this moment of forgetfulness and please Father please calm my mind and my spirit so that I may be able to think and understand clearly because Father, your will be done. I pray for the Holy Spirit to come into my heart and never let me forget you again. This I pray Lord God in Jesus' name, amen.